We Are All Bl@zer Now: Why Ace of Spades Went Dark

9 Jun

So, yesterday was the Great American Blog-Out in support of all the victims of Brett Kimberlin’s legal harassment of his critics, and the extra-legal (and illegal) harassment and threats made by his followers.  Specifically, SWATting.

So, Ace put up his post here.  Well written, impassioned and sad, because in the comments, Ace revealed that he would not be accepting the Breitbart award, due to concerns over his physical safety.  He was unnecessarily hard on himself, as usual, and as usual, most of us tried to buck him up with humor.

And then some commenters lost their fucking minds and started writing these types of comments:

“Pussy.  I’d have gone because I ain’t a-skeered of no man.”

Ok, fine.  Ignorant as fuck for many reasons, but fine by community standards.  And then along came “Jimmah.”

Jimmah decided that he was going to take on all comers, including Ace.  He was going to throw down the gauntlet, dare anyone to come and get him.  Sue me.  SWAT me.  Go after my job, because I’m self-employed.  You can’t hurt me.

And by the way, here’s my name, address and telephone number. 

What a fucking asshole.  Here’s why you’re an asshole, Jimmah.  You can say all of those things you want to say about Kimberlin.  You can even directly threaten Kimberlin.  DO IT ON YOUR OWN BLOG, YOU FUCKING PUSSY.  You don’t have the right to drag other people into your bullshit.  And if you’re such a tough guy, why are you hiding behind Ace’s skirt, Jimmah?

  1. Because it’s safe.  You’ve got Ace to take the hit for you.  These people aren’t going after commenters, they’re going after blog proprietors.  The legal argument this guy is going to make is that if Ace had the ability, through moderation, banning or implementing a registration system to control or delete offensive posts, and still didn’t do so, that he was effectively condoning and encouraging ASSHOLES LIKE YOU to make threatening comments on his site.  It ain’t a good argument, but it was enough to get Aaron Worthing arrested for violating a peace order.  FOR COMMENTS ASSHOLES LIKE YOU MADE.  Yeah, it’ll get overturned, but one senile judge can cause inconvenience and thousands of dollars in legal bills.  Fucking dick.
  2. Because you’re a fucking NOBODY.  You could start your own blog for free on WordPress or Blogspot, but you won’t because nobody will ever see the Internet Tough Guy bullshit you write.  And if the wrong person saw it and came after you legally, no one would rally to help you out BECAUSE YOU’RE A FUCKING ASSHOLE.

Perhaps it was inevitable that Ace would eventually have to move to comments registration, but it’s still sad to see the community change.  As I was just explaining to my wife, It Ain’t Worth It.  How much of a man’s time must be stolen to tilt nipple to some fucking baby who can’t quit squalling?  Fuck that.  For all of our teasing Ace about being a RINO pussy, he’s given us more freedom to behave like adults, as long as we weren’t abusing anyone, than any other site on the innertubes.  This type of community doesn’t exist anywhere.  ANYWHERE.

Congratulations, “Jimmah.”  You finally found a way to fuck it up for everyone.  Hope you take the gas pipe, shitball.

P.S. Fuck you.

59 Responses to “We Are All Bl@zer Now: Why Ace of Spades Went Dark”

  1. retread03 June 9, 2012 at 12:05 pm #

    Jeff, you might find it worth your time to take a look at Ace’s main page.

  2. lizardbrain June 9, 2012 at 12:06 pm #

    Expressed with your usual restraint and delicacy. Thank you for saying what most of us think.

  3. Delta Smelt (@Delta_Smelt) June 9, 2012 at 12:06 pm #


    Although we are all “Blazer” only in the short term. Jimmah and a handful of other shitheads permanently.

  4. pissoir dubuque June 9, 2012 at 12:07 pm #

    thanks for ‘splaining what was going on. i hadn’t read Ace for the last couple of days and when i checked in early this morning, i couldn’t figure out what was up. turns out it was the “internet fuckwad theory” times 10. strange big things are afoot these days, with the recent blatant assaults on freedom of speech. BIG things. we’re not in kansas anymore. i hope ace’s site is not gone, or changed beyond recognition. that would be utterly horrible.

  5. lauraw June 9, 2012 at 12:09 pm #

    Well done sir.

  6. Niedermeyer's Dead Horse June 9, 2012 at 12:11 pm #

    Ace displayed a level of patience of which I am incapable. They were behaving like spoiled 15 years olds talking back to their mommies. In the end, it was Jimmah, but prior to Jimmah were arhooley, adjoran and …who else, EOJ? It seems like there was someone else.

  7. Niedermeyer's Dead Horse June 9, 2012 at 12:12 pm #

    Laura, that photo is da bomb!

  8. Krebs v Carnot June 9, 2012 at 12:13 pm #

    Well done, EoJ!

    But he wasn’t just “Jimmah” – he was Thomas Friggin’ Paine, baby! Doin’ it bareback! Doin’ it loud and doin’ it proud! All while hiding behind Ace – leading from behind, IOW.

  9. Mandy P. (@mrflibbleisvryx) June 9, 2012 at 12:13 pm #

    I left to put my kids to bed and then this crap happened? Jeez! My kids have more sense than some adults apparently. Thanks a lot, Jimmah, for being an asshole and ruining things for everyone else.

    Good post, Jeff!

  10. Krebs v Carnot June 9, 2012 at 12:16 pm #

    @NDH: the other was Jimbo, but sockpuppeting…

  11. osoloco June 9, 2012 at 12:16 pm #

    Good summary, EoJ.

  12. JM Flynn (@mflynny) June 9, 2012 at 12:22 pm #

    Ahhh. That’s right! He was posting as Excretius, right?

  13. kbdabear June 9, 2012 at 12:24 pm #

    Jimmah came busting in dressed in full Postal worker regalia and shouted “FREEEDDDOMMMM !!!” . So nice that while he’s supposedly got a .50 cal mounted in his basement window and mines planted in his front lawn, he’ll never see the default judgement and lien against him in another state.

    He’s the smartass kid who flips you the bird while standing next to his buddies on the football team

  14. Darth Wyatt (@DarthWyatt) June 9, 2012 at 12:24 pm #

    “tilt nipple.” That’s beautiful, man!

  15. empireofjeff June 9, 2012 at 12:26 pm #

    Yeah, Jimbo, that’s right. He was the first layer on the shitcake.

    Also, I see Andy’s got an alternate site up – I’ll redirect my reader over there.

  16. Velvet Ambition June 9, 2012 at 12:29 pm #

    Thanks for the info EOJ.

  17. redc1c4 June 9, 2012 at 12:31 pm #

    fuck Jimmah side ways, with a tanker’s bar wrapped in three coils of concertina and heated white hot.

    then we can start the punishments. what a fing douchebag.

  18. rockmom June 9, 2012 at 12:32 pm #

    Wow, thanks for the 411, Jeff. I missed the brouhaha. I do think we should consider all of this part of a large plot to shut down conservative blogs. It’s possible that Jimmah and the other asshole commenters are actually moles who have been posting for a long time and just waiting for their chance to get Ace shut down or force him to shut down himself.

  19. Kevin in ABQ June 9, 2012 at 12:33 pm #

    Nicely put, Jeff. I thought about adding in a reference to longbows last night, but thought better of it. Jimmah can go sit on top of a longbow for all I care.

  20. naturalfake June 9, 2012 at 12:43 pm #

    Thanks for the update, EOJ.

    And Jimmah, you can give yourself a shotgun enema.

  21. pitchforksandpowder June 9, 2012 at 12:43 pm #

    P.S. Fuck you.

    absofuckinglutely eloquent. did’nt expect anything less from you. well done, sir. well done.

  22. Cicero June 9, 2012 at 12:46 pm #

    Wow. I missed all the fun last night. Thanks for the report, EOJ.

  23. Militant Bibliophile (@MilBibliophile) June 9, 2012 at 12:47 pm #

    Thanks for the run down, EOJ. I’ve managed to catch almost every major fracas (with the exception of the infamous longbow incident) on the blog since about ’05-’06, and I manage to miss this one. Well, now I feel less left out. And I’ve got another moron blog to read (yeah, yeah, I’m slow, I know this)!

  24. jeffbisbacktorootingforsmod June 9, 2012 at 12:50 pm #

    This whole situation is making me so mad I could spit.

  25. empireofjeff June 9, 2012 at 12:54 pm #

    Thanks, everyone. I would say we have the technology and we can rebuild it, but c’mon. It’s fucking PIXY MISA. I’m still waiting for him to finish programming the clock on my Betamax VCR.

    Best thing we can do is lovebomb that furry little bastard over at http://acedark.wordpress.com and try to get it through to him that his efforts are worth it and appreciated by a lot of us.

    If you’re a lurker, get off your slack ass, open an account and post something encouraging for Ace. Dude’s having a hell of a rough time with himself not going to the Breitbart award dinner, and this is not what you need when you’re already feeling down on yourself.

    I know there’s a lot of you out there. Chime in, you poncy bastards.

  26. butch June 9, 2012 at 1:03 pm #

    “Chime in, you poncy bastards.”

    Right up there with Henry V’s Crispin’s Day speech!

  27. TGSG June 9, 2012 at 1:03 pm #

    lurk? Shirley you jest.

  28. daveintexas June 9, 2012 at 1:19 pm #

    Hear, hear. Excellent work my friend.

  29. Dave X SixtyFour June 9, 2012 at 1:31 pm #

    Well stated in your usual excellent colourful style, Jeff!

  30. Anonymous June 9, 2012 at 1:34 pm #

    Thanks EOJ. What a shame. All around.

  31. empireofjeff June 9, 2012 at 1:37 pm #

    Thanks, Morons.

  32. fastfreefall June 9, 2012 at 1:38 pm #

    Mr EOJ,
    well put sir. One can be the safest, conciencious (sp?), and most upright citizen but it’s always some other puto (asshole) that crahses in to you, causes you to crash, or generally fucks things up for you.

  33. lonemarauder June 9, 2012 at 1:38 pm #

    Nicely done, EOJ. Didn’t even know you had a blog, have to add it to my Google Reader list.

  34. creeper00 June 9, 2012 at 1:39 pm #

    Thanks for the explanation, Jeff. And here I thought the ten-car pileup at the races last night was bad.

  35. rightlysouthern June 9, 2012 at 1:55 pm #

    As usual, EOJs prosey fingertips peck out blast of commentary for the consensus.

  36. Deety June 9, 2012 at 2:05 pm #

    Oh, sigh…

    Thanks Jeff for putting up an explanatory post and the cursing.

    Mostly I thank you for the cursing though.

    I am like Salieri, fashioning my frustration, outrage and withering scorn into sevicable enough dittys, come upon a Mozart.

  37. Jay in Ames June 9, 2012 at 2:22 pm #

    Nice work on the recap, EoJ. I look forward to the new site. I’m sure the registration will just be a speedbump to the majority of us morons, and will only make the site better.

  38. Warden June 9, 2012 at 2:36 pm #

    It’s the same usual assholes every single time, ain’t it? And they’re on that blog all … fucking …day. Small, talentless, uninteresting man-children, screaming impotently at the world, demanding relevancy and respect that will never come because it hasn’t been earned. For the Pure Conservative Brigades, ideology is nothing more than a vehicle by which they express their pathology.

  39. Deathknyte June 9, 2012 at 2:44 pm #

    Well, now I know what happened. Really though, registration for commenting has been needed for years. I don’t know what I would read if Ace decided to shut down. He is my main source of news so I don’t have to read the corporate mfm to know what is going on.

  40. lordnazh June 9, 2012 at 3:58 pm #

    tell us how you really feel 🙂

  41. Deathknyte June 9, 2012 at 4:41 pm #

    Huh, the new commenting thingy at Acedark won’t let me comment.

    Not that I have much to add anyway.

  42. pawn June 9, 2012 at 5:02 pm #

    Long time poncy bastard here just keeping my toe in the water. Keeping the flame can be ugly business.

  43. grognard @ AoSHQ (@fiffergrund32) June 9, 2012 at 5:23 pm #

    When EOJ unleashes, I can hear it in Toronto. Thousands of hipsters cry out in fear…. and are silenced.

  44. Guaman June 9, 2012 at 6:08 pm #

    I visit Ace multiple times per day and there is nothing quite like it, nothing. Velociman can write too, but it’s not frequent and he doesn’t have the stable of really great co-bloggers that Ace does.

    It’s been tempting to post over there over the years, but the moron horde is too quick, too sharp, and way too many to get an intelligent word in edgewise.

    The world needs consumers of snark, foul language, and pretty deep insights as offered by Ace. That’d be me. Ace shutting down would be worse than the loss of Acidman, or the retirement of Dennis the Peasant by several orders of magnitude.

    There are loyal readers out here and it is a great service to the betterment of mankind that Ace of Spades brings. Someone has to call bullshit on the whole game and Ace does it in the most brutal, honest, and entertaining way of any of ’em. That’s my most serious opionion there boys.

    Never, ever surrender.

  45. mpfs June 9, 2012 at 6:50 pm #

    Epic rant EoJ.
    Poncy bastards is almost as good as CHOKWIT ICE CREAM!

  46. Alaskan Warthog June 9, 2012 at 7:01 pm #

    Thanks, EOJ. I’ve been on and off AOSHQ, in various forms of Wonderwarthog since 2008. (Mostly off, until now) Anyhoo, you earned my undying friendship, coming on after an evening of pointless bullshit by myself and more experienced morons, by exclaiming: “Harumph WonderWarthog, Harumph!” Cracked me up and made me feel like part of the gang. This was especially nice because I had lost my job, which was leading to the loss of my house; and in fairly short order, the end of my marriage. Anyway, I always enjoyed your ability to combine hilarious vulgarity with sharp clear commentary. Didn’t you come up with: “Fuck ’em, that’s why.”?

  47. Empire of Jeff June 9, 2012 at 9:18 pm #

    Thanks, everyone. Warthog, that’s nice to hear. I had several nights of drunken self pity on AoS when my business failed a few years ago, and there was always someone around to listen to my whining and cheer me up. I am gratified and honored to repay that kindness in whatever small measure I can to a fellow Moron.

    None of you lurkers should ever be afraid to jump in – the more voices, the better. Except for curious. She can take a flying fuck at a rolling garbage truck, fuckin’ crazy catlady shut-in spinster.

  48. Blue Hen June 9, 2012 at 9:58 pm #

    As the man said in Braveheart: “I expect that was a bit less cordial than he was accustomed”.

  49. Blue Hen June 9, 2012 at 10:10 pm #

    I think that I finally got the stupid avatar to work!

  50. Gem June 10, 2012 at 8:40 am #

    I’ve been hovering around the site like a bird with a broken wing since Saturday a.m., wondering exactly what the heck happened. Thanks for the concise explanation of everything that went down, EoJ.

  51. Empire of Jeff June 10, 2012 at 8:45 am #

    No, he wasn’t. And nice try, whoever the fuck “floydmerit” is. If you had fucking read what I wrote, you would understand that what Jimmah did was post HIS OWN address, daring you psycho lefties to “come get him.” He didn’t threaten anyone, unlike your sociopathic crew.

  52. unclefacts June 10, 2012 at 6:23 pm #

    Yeah I can’t add much more to what you already wrote EoJ, except fuckin’ a right.

  53. SiM June 10, 2012 at 9:42 pm #

    I remember your meltdown over your restaurant. The menu you linked was awesome. i wish you every success in your new home in Canada!

  54. Larry Wilcoxx June 11, 2012 at 11:02 pm #

    Jeez…the idea that anybody would give a shit what you losers (and this includes the mental giant Ace) have to say is hilarious.

  55. Alaskan Warthog June 12, 2012 at 1:19 am #

    Yet here you are Larry, givin’ a shit.

  56. Empire of Jeff June 12, 2012 at 10:05 am #

    Heh, good point, Warthog. Nothing says “I DO care about what you assholes are saying” than coming to an obscure new blog with zero readership to drop that insult.

    Do you realize what a fucking idiot you look like, Larry?

    If you didn’t before, you should now.

    Sweet dreams, fuckbag.

  57. Amy Shulkusky June 12, 2012 at 3:06 pm #

    Geez, I had no idea! ACE {pixy?} banned me last month and while I get “Oops, I’ll fix it” emails, I’m still banned, so I stopped reading. Talking smack is stupid, doing it while in someone else’s house? Idiotic.

  58. Vladimir Tepes September 13, 2016 at 5:39 pm #

    Arsehole of Spades believes in free speech about as much as the Taliban does… John Ekdahl can go suck a camel túrd…

    Retaining control of US foreign policy is what drives Hillary’s flying monkeys… along with the millions Goldman Sachs and the Saudis have paid her.


  1. What Happened at Ace of Spades HQ? (Updated) | Darth Chipmunk - June 9, 2012

    […] III:] Jeff has the skinny posted in The Empire. Share this: This entry was posted in Government/Politics and tagged Civility. Bookmark the […]

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